Rant of the Week

How Could You Tell?

 

Stephen Kai Yiu Chung, 60, was arrested in Ancaster yesterday.  Chung has been practicing medicine in Ancaster, Ontario for 15 years.  I'll bet you think he's a respected member of the community and that everyone was shocked when he was arrested?

Well, not everyone.  You see, the main problem is that Mr. Chung is not a doctor.  He was licensed by the ever-vigilant College of Physicians until last month, but not everyone who is licensed to practice as a doctor is a doctor.  They discovered that he actually had no medical training, no medical degree, and no qualifications to practice medicine.

Well, I'm not one to be picky.  And who knows, if I ever lose my present job, I may want to go into medicine myself.  Obviously, it can't be as difficult as it looks.  If Mr. Chung can get by for fifteen years without raising any suspicions, I figure I could last for five at least, maybe ten.

So how did they finally catch up with the ingenious Mr. Chung?  Did someone finally notice him reattaching hands backwards?  Did he prescribe expensive drugs of dubious medicinal value?  Did he ignore his patients needs and see them only when it was convenient for himself?  Did he recommend useless surgeries to pad his OHIP billings?  Did he ridicule and attack cheap, readily available natural remedies?  Did he recommend that his patients ignore the causes of their illnesses and just pay him for treatment instead? 

No.  You see, none of those things--aside from attaching the hands backwards-- would have actually raised any suspicions about him actually being a doctor.  Just as every person who tries to seek compensation for you after you have suffered grievous harm at hands of a heartless, criminally negligent corporation, and then impoverishes you with his own absurdly excessive billing, is not necessarily a lawyer.

No, they caught Mr. Chung by pure chance.  It appears that some other guy in London, Ontario, named Roark, embarrassed the heck out of the College of Physicians by doing a little heart surgery on the side without having actually acquired any training to do so.  After this public humiliation, the College decided to get right on top of things and try to find out exactly how many of our respected doctors are actually... "qualified". 

By the way, some woman has charged Mr. Chung with sexual assault.  This happened five years ago.  It's nice to know that not only can you practice medicine without any qualifications for fifteen years without being caught in Ontario, but you can toss in a few assaults and forged documents while you're at it.  

Nobody will notice.

© Copyright 1998 Bill Van Dyk

 

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 1998 All Rights Reserved