Rant of the Week

The Disneyland George Bush

Let us all take a moment and celebrate the achievements of George Bush, now that the full moon wanes on his administration and the pardons are readied to be delivered. When George Bush came into office, America was troubled with a vast budget surplus, peace and stability, cheap oil prices, a decreasing crime rate, low unemployment, a functional but deficient social security system, modest but effective environmental regulations, and a split Supreme Court.

After George improved the education system so that America is now-- what is it? 21st in the world? And then solved the social security crisis by doing nothing, he eased everyone's health care concerns by providing elderly Americans with a confusing and expensive drug plan. He open the nation's forests and wildlife preserves to oil drilling and forestry where-ever he could, and made it easier for America's manufacturers to sell defective products without consequence, which didn't stop them from shipping most of those jobs to China. Did I mention the trade deficit?

Or the unimaginable increase in military spending which has succeeded in creating millions of new enemies in Pakistan and Egypt and Saudi Arabia? He did nothing for peace in Palestine but that's a lost cause anyway. He corrected the crazy perception that most independent scientists believe that humans are causing global warming by arranging an overwhelming number of oil industry employees to say they're not.

He appointed partisan political hacks to the Justice Department to correct fears most Americans have that the justice system is above partisan politics.

He managed the mortgage crisis so effortlessly that naive observers are still convinced he did nothing. He managed health care so effectively using competition to drive down costs so precipitously that most Americans now claim they don't need health insurance.

The inevitable George Bush presidential library should have one volume in it, with the title, written in crayon. "How I helped a small number of wealthy Americans become even more wealthy."